Around 15,000 years ago, an eruption happened in a land that would be named Oregon. This eruption was pretty big deal, just like when Tupac took the stage as a hologram at Coachella. The eruption created a shield volcano that would soon grow up to be Mt. Bachelor. After sitting around doing nothing and lying to the government about looking for work for 200 years, the little shield decided to grow a pair - a stratovolcano was formed out of the next eruption on top of the shield volcano. After that impressive trick, the double-stacked volcano emailed the samoan demanding that she visit and went to sleep.
In this tale, we find the volcano incredibly cozy - for the snow gods had blessed it with about 30 feet of snow and it was only the very beginning of February. The samoan and giant were ever so excited to see the volcano in this state, so they flew into Portland in an airplane, stole blankat's car, and drove to Bend. Bend is a super cool host, with a bit of a beer obsession.
It was Vertfest on the mountain that Saturday. Vertfest is a backcountry festival with races and snow clinics focused on continuing the stoke and keeping everyone in the know. The festival also brought the SnoPlank dudes with their sublime handcrafted bamboo boards to demo. The samoan was given the Snoday to play with.
The hill was touched with a bit of new snow, but the summit wasn't open, so the giant and the samoan headed to the Northwest trees. The snow and weather seemed to change every couple of hundred feet. There was fluffy pow, dust on crust, heavy pow, and stickyicky (down low). The Snoday crushed all of the above (Big Pun) and just floated along. After three and a half hours, it was time to give back the destroyer. It was a sorrowful moment, but someday the board will be added to the quiver.
Sunday was indeed that. Beach weather with the southeast slopes going off right away. Long runs were made off the summit to the Sunrise Express. Cornbread. They rode amongst the moon rocks and strange alien trees. The giant had never seen such massive snow waves off the back. It was set after set out there. Hikes to the West Wall were also made resulting in fine cream lines. As the day got stickier, both were embarrassed to admit that they hadn't recently waxed their boards. They were totally snail trailing on the Getback cat tracks. That night, they were giddy from the magmatic day. Boards were tuned, dumplings from Dump City were eaten, and they passed out on the floor.
The next day was another beautiful day in the neighborhood; in fact the next three days were lunartastic. The sun was making that velvet, and they were out there to drape those lines. At this point, they couldn't remember if they liked blower powder days or silky corn sunshine hoodie days best. The samoan had taken to only making robot sounds and laughing (which means she's the happiest). Day after day they stayed on rotation slaying the swells - following the sun 360 degrees around the celestial volcano.
After the fifth day, a rest day was taken because the samoan is weak.
Wind cooled off the summit on the seventh day. Laps around the world were still made, but the two stayed lower playing in the trees and doing embarrassing things in the park.
Then the somber, dark side of the trip came. The last day. The last waves were ridden under the lava fields, and a storm rolled in covering the summit. As always, tears were had on the drive away from the glorious Mt. Bachelor and they began arranging plans to move to Oregon.
Thank you for having us Mt. Bachelor! If you wanna settle down and get married you know where to find us.